


Whovian Musical

by ImQuiteTheScreamer (MattexIsAsRealAsTilena)



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Mild Language, Multi, Musical
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-20
Updated: 2013-11-16
Packaged: 2017-12-30 00:22:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 2,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1011809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MattexIsAsRealAsTilena/pseuds/ImQuiteTheScreamer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A non-linear Doctor Who musical with weird songs, many characters and a strange plot. No character bashing (hopefully). Enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Character List

**Author's Note:**

> Okay. So I have a bad track record with fics. But hey. Here's the character list as I don't use full names in the script.

D- doctor  
A-amy  
r-rory  
R-river  
a-amelia  
Rt-rose  
J-cap. Jack  
M-martha  
m-mickey  
j-jackie  
o/c-clara oswin oswald  
dn-donna  
10-10 duplicate

Monsters:  
d-daleks  
C-cyberman  
c-cassandra  
Tm-the master

To clarify:  
If I say D: oh my god. I mean the Doctor said oh my god. If I say D:*oh my god.* I mean the Doctor sang oh my god. Ok. Good look with understanding this.


	2. Scene 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First scene. Hope you like it!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song is Zig a Zig ah or whatever it's called. Anything you recognise IS NOT MINE. Unfortunately.

D: All of time, all of space, where do you wannau go?  
A&a:*Hm, lets see*  
M:*I wanna huh*   
Rt:*I wanna huh*  
o/c:*I wanna huh*  
J:*I wanna huh*  
dn:*oh what I really really wanna*  
all-R:*zig-a-zig-ah*  
A: No... *I wanna go see Ms Song*  
D:*If you wanna be my companion, you've gotta come up with some good places to go, otherwise it gets boring, and I really don't wanna know*  
r:*What do you think about that, now you know how he feels, think you can handle this danger, how can you love me?*  
J:*Better not go wasting*  
10:*her precious time,*  
m:*get your act together,*  
J&10&m:*and you'll be just fine*  
r:*well I know all of that, know it all already*  
A:*oh shut up stupid face, you're my one and only love*  
All-A&r&R:aaahhh  
A:shut it  
D:very well, stormcage here we come!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reveiws & kudos make me happy :)


	3. Scene 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welcome River! Btw, it's a Donna from after Silence in The Library. Wibby wobbly timey wimey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, songs are a bit of a Les Mis song, some of Take me or Leave me from Rent and a bit of No Life Without Wife from Bride & Prejudice. Nothing you recognise is mine.

R:*do you hear that lovely sound, the sound of the TARDIS materialising, do you hear that lovely sound, it's the Doctor coming in*  
D:hi honey, I'm home  
R:and what sort of time do you call this? Hello, sweetie.  
D:come on then, get in the TARDIS, we've got guests  
R:oh really, sweetie  
D:behave!  
R:now that's no fun at all.  
dn:p...p...p...proffesor song. Hi! Long time no see. Um, doctor.  
D:yeah,  
dn: how?  
D:that's later in her time stream. Donna Noble, DOCTOR Song. Doctor Song, Donna Noble, Martha  
R:Jones, yeah. I know the legends. Which means this must be Mickey Smith, yeah?  
m:um, yeah  
R:Rose Tyler & her mother Jackie, your duplicate, remember you telling me about him. And Clara, or do you prefer Oswin.  
o/c:Doctor how comes she knows all of us. And Oswins fine, love.  
j:yeah, Doctor who's this swanning in here and knowing all of us?  
m:oh ho, the mrs & the exes. Wellcome to..  
10:oh, shut up mickey  
Rt:yeah Mickey, you're not helping  
m:oh, well excuse me!  
M:oi! Dont go picking on him!  
10:oh, please dont fight, no fighti...  
J: well, well, well. Doctor River Song. Long time.  
R:Captain Jack. No see.  
D:River! You went out with Jack!  
R:Yeah, and how many of the people in here have you snogged!  
D:Well, but, I...  
R:oh give me a break! *every single day, I walk down the street, I hear people say "Baby's so sweet". Ever since regenerating, everybody stares at me, boys, girls, I can't help it sweetie. So be kind, and don't lose your mind, just remember, I'm your baby! Take me for what I am, who I was meant to be. And if you give a damn, take me baby or leave me. Take me baby or leave me. A prisoner in Stormcage, can never see the sun, this diva needs her stage, Sweetie, let's have fun! You are the one I choose, folks would kill to fill your shoes, you love the limelight too, now Sweetie! So be mine, and don't waste my time saying oh oh, my love, are you stilly my baby!*(starts to lift top up)  
A:Melody!  
r:don't you dare!  
R:*take me for what I am, who I was meant to be, and if you give a damn, take me baby or leave me. Take me baby or leave me. No way, can I be what I'm not. But hey, don't you like your girl hot!* (starts slipping off trousers, not far)  
r:Melody Williams!  
A:Pond!  
R:*you are the one I choose, folks would kill to fill your shoes, you love the limelight too now Sweetie! Take me for what I am, who I was meant to be, and if you give a damn, take me baby or leave me. Take me baby or leave me. Cause every night, who's in your bed? Who? Kiss sweetie*  
A: right, Melody Pond that is enough! Stop terrorising your husband and get to your room!  
R: yes, mother. Guess I'm leaving. I'm gone.  
Rt:Husband?  
M:Mother?  
a:Melody?  
dn:Spaceman?  
r:let's just say, Mr Song has  
A&r:*no life, without wife*  
10&J&m:*oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah*  
A&r:*no life, without wife*  
10&J&m:*oh yeah yeah yeah*  
a&dn&j&Rt&M&o/c:*oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah*  
D: oh ha, ha, ha. I'm gonna go see how River is.  
Rt: i'll come to.  
D:um, ok.  
r:be aware, I have a sword.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reveiw?


	4. Scene 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose and the Doctor have a chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song is Someone Like You. Nothing belongs to me if you recognise it, yada yada yada.

Rt:so, wife?  
D:oh, um, yeah, well.... um  
Rt:I don't mind Doctor, I've got someone like you, don't I?  
D:well, yeah, but  
Rt*Don't worry, I've got, someone like you, I wish nothing but the best, for you two. Just don't forget me, doctor, I remember you saying, Rose Tyler, I- but you never finished the sentence. You were gonna say I love you, but now you love her instead. You'd know, how the time flies, only yesterday, was the time of our lives. We were running & fighting on several different worlds, yeah yeah. I know I turned up out of the blue uninvited, but I couldn't stay away, we had to come back. I kinda hoped you'd see my face, and that you'd realise. That for me, it isn't over. But I was wrong, I'm actually happy. And I'm glad that you are to. You didn't forget me, oh babe. And that's enough for me. I'm glad that you're happy, and I know that I am as well. I'm glad that you're happy, just remember I am as well.*  
D:ok, ok. Come on, her room's here.  
Rt:should we knock?  
D:yeah, ok. Go on then.  
Rt:why me?  
D:cause she won't be expecting you.  
Rt:I suppose. River, it's me and the Doctor... River? River?  
D:you ok, Riv?  
R:yeah, everything's fine.  
D:can we come in?  
R:just a minute!  
Rt:do you want me to go?  
R:no, no, no sweetie it's fine. Ok, you can come in now!  
D:River! You're only wearing a towel!   
R:yeah, I had a shower.  
Rt: do you want us to go?  
R:na, salright.  
Rt:so, how'd you two meet?   
R:now thats a whole different story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Review or kudos?:) :)


	5. Scene 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> River and The Doctor try to explain Berlin to Rose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing is mine, blah blah blah boring. Song is Summer Nights.

D:*We met in Berlin, I was smitten  
R:I tried to kill him, but then didn't  
D:She had just, regenerated  
R:It was all, fun and new stuff.  
R&D:Those days, oh those alien planets, but uh, oh those summer nights.  
Rt:well-a-well-a-well-a-huh. Tell me more, tell me more, did you run around lots? Tell me more, tell me more, like did he show off lots?  
R:uh huh  
D:mm hm  
R:uh huh  
D:mm hm  
R&D: boodepod de baaam!!!  
D:Then she killed me, with a kiss.  
R:But I saved him, gave him the rest of my lives   
D:Saved my life, though I was already dead  
R:He showed off, running around  
R&D:Those days, oh those alien planets, but uh oh those summer nights.*  
Rt:Sorry, but I'm confused. You killed him and then brought him back to life!? Does that mean you're a female Timelord?  
R:Born & raised. Conceived while the TARDIS was in the vortex... Wedding night.  
Rt:But Doctor, that means that you're not the last.  
D:Ah, well see thing is, is that she can die now. She gave me all of her other regenerations when she saved me. She's almost exactly like you mere mortals now.  
R:With a few crucial differences.  
Rt:Like what?  
R:Stamina, don't need as much sleep or food, faster, faster and easier healing, can sense time & space, fixed points, you know...  
Rt:So basically like being a timelord without the regenerating and with dying?  
D:Um, suppose. Come on, we've left the Ponds to do explanations long enough without us.  
R:Now that I would've loved to see.  
Rt:Wonder what happened...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reveiw or kudos :) :) :)


	6. Scene 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amy and Rory badly explain River Song to everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song is Map of Tasmania. Nothing is mine, otherwise every dw episode would have ALL possible characters in.

All-A&r&D&R&Rt:(random speaking, cross at A &r)  
A:Allright, allright. If you want answers then shut up a minute. Shut up!  
j:we want answers! You can't just have someone swanning in here like she owns the place. Like she knows all of us!  
J:Hear hear!  
M:why don't we hear them out? Get answers.  
a:You called her Melody. Like Mels?  
r:Exactly like Mels.  
a:No. No, that doesn't work. Mels is my age. And black.  
A:*oh. My. God.*  
dn:what?  
A:*Look, ok she is my daughter*  
r:*oh. My. God*  
10:oh, what?  
r:*look, ok she is my daughter*  
A&r:*oh. My. God.*  
o/c:what now?  
A&r:*look, ok she is my daughter, concieved on this here TARDIS, whilst we were in the time vortex. That's why she is kinda timelordy.  
A:Then she went and married the Doctor, just a very short time ago. She's his wife and she is my daughter, that is all that you really need to know.  
m:That still doesn't answer our questions!  
o/c:We want to know who she is, how she knows all of us.  
10:How she ended up in Stormcage.  
dn:We want to know we can trust her.  
A:oh. My. God.  
r:of course you can.  
A:oh. My. God  
r:he does so so should you  
A&r:as for who she is that's hard to answer. She shouldn't be locked up in Stormcage, she was trained to kill the Doctor, and in the end she saved his lives. She is is wonderful and kind, she is couragous and brave*   
A:and standing right there?  
M:yeah...  
R:Bravo, nice song. Didn't realise you thought so highly of me.  
r:Melody? Don't be stupid. We love you.  
R:Yeah. As a friend perhaps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggest a song with a bit of a plot idea & I might write it, if I like the song?


	7. Scene 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> River explains to the Ponds why they never really treated her like a daughter. Everyone gives some space, even if they don't want to *cough*JACK*cough*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song lines come from Franm Turner: Plain Sailing Weather and Paloma Faith: Picking up the Peices. Not's mine.

A:What do you mean. Your our daughter, we love you.  
r:Of course we do Mels.  
R:You never really accepted I was your daughter.  
m:I'm gonna go get some tea, anyone else want some?  
M:Yeah, I'll come.   
Rt:And me. Come on Mum.  
j:Oh, but.  
Rt:Mum. Donna?  
dn:Yeah, alright, I'll come to.  
10:Well, as that's where the party is.  
o/c:Come on Jack, show me around. You've been here before, right?  
J:Yeah, one second.   
o/c:Jack.  
J:But I wann... oh, alright.  
D:Why don't I help?  
R:Sweetie.  
D:(sigh)  
A:So you think we don't acept you as our daughter.   
R:I know you don't  
r: How?  
R:You were grieving. It's allowed.  
A:But you shouldn't feel like that.  
r:Never.  
R:*Do you think of her, when your with me? Look at your short time together, who's face do you see? Do you wish I was, actually her? Am I to loud? I play the clown, to cover up all these doubts. Perfect heart, she's flawless, she's the other me, shining in her splendour, the one you lost. Now she's gone, and I'm picking up the peices, I watch you cry. But you don't see, that I'm the one by your side. Now she's gone, in her shadow is it me you see, cause Kovarian has Melody, and I'm picking up the peices, she left behind. *  
A:Wow.  
r:Wow.   
R:Is that all you can say? Wow? I knew I shouldn't have bothered. I'm going to find someone else to be with, who isn't sick of me.  
A&r:Melody...  
R:Don't! Don't Melody me ok! Just shut up!  
D:I'm sorry, Amy, Rory, this is all my fault.  
A&r:no, doctor...  
D:*Just give me one fine day of plain sailing weather And I can fuck up anything, anything. It was a wonderful life when we were together, And now I've fucked up every little goddamn thing*  
A:No. No, you haven't.  
r:Honest Doctor.  
D:well. I'm going to try and find your daughter before she kills someone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pls give me some suggestions :)


	8. Scene 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song is The Time Worp. You know the drill, nothing you recognise is mine.

D: River?  
R: What Doctor?  
D: I'm sorry, about before.   
R: It's not your fault. I get it. They lost a baby and I'll never be her.  
D: River I...  
R: Can it Doctor. I'm just not who they want. Come on, take me on an adventure. You can drive, then it really will be random.  
D:.Hey!  
R: Ha ha.  
D: *It's astounding, time is fleeting   
J: Madness takes its toll   
10: But listen closely, not for very much longer   
m: I've got to keep control   
r: I remember doing the Time Warp   
D: Drinking those moments when  
J: the blackness would hit me and   
10: the void would be calling   
All: Let's do the time warp again... Let's do the time warp again!   
Men: It's just a jump to the left  
Women: And then a step to the right   
All: With your hands on your hips. You bring your knees in tight but it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane. Let's do the Time Warp again!   
R:It's so dreamy, oh fantasy free me   
A: So you can't see me, no not at all  
a: In another dimension, with voyeuristic intention   
Rt: Well-secluded, I see all   
o/c:With a bit of a mind flip   
dn: You're there in the time slip   
J: And nothing can ever be the same  
R: You're spaced out on sensation  
A: Like you're under sedation.  
All: Let's do the time worp again!   
Male: It's just a jump to the left  
Female: And then a step to the right   
All: With your hands on your hips You bring your knees in tight. But it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane Let's do the Time Warp again!  
D: And we've landed!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please kkudos or comment? Give me an idea for a song!!!!


End file.
